It’s Mental Health Awareness Week and we’re looking at people’s experiences of mental health issues – their own and those of their loved ones. Here, our writer describes her boyfriend’s struggle with depression – and the toll it took on her. I met Liam the way many modern romances start. We were friends of friends who started chatting online. He offered to help me with my art magazine and it went from there. We started dating and a month later he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was easy, carefree and very fun. He quickly became my best friend and for the first time, aged 22, I felt I had a partner — not just a boyfriend. We were building our careers – mine in art, his in music – and we were doing it together, making our big decisions as a team and celebrating successes with wine at night. He started touring abroad for months at a time.
Dating Someone With Depression – 12 Things You Need to Know
This is something that we should definitely be talking about. For one thing, it is very likely that you will at least go on a date with someone who is suffering or has suffered from mental health problems. Here are some things to think about when it comes to getting into a relationship with someone with depression , anxiety , PTSD , ADHD or similar mental health conditions:. As mentioned above, it is likely that you have already encountered someone with mental health problems in your dating life.
In order for maintain a line of open communication, your partner needs to know that you are okay talking about his mental health without judgment or assumption. One good thing that you can do is have a weekly check-in with your partner.
My personal take is the author simply wasn’t equipped to deal with a partner coping with depression. Most of us aren’t. Last year when I plunged into a depressive.
Dating someone with depression can be an intimidating prospect, but by understanding a few basics you can set the stage for a strong and loving relationship. By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process , you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark on this new adventure. Starting a relationship can be an exhilarating time; everything is new and exciting and there is so much to discover. Everyone feels sad from time to time, but depression is different than normal mood fluctuations.
Understanding the reality of depression is vital to being a good ally as you embark on your relationship. Educate yourself about the illness; there are endless online resources where you can read about depression from both medical and personal standpoints to help you gain a deeper understanding of what the illness looks and feels like.
10 Ways to Help Yourself When Your Partner Is Depressed
Have a question? Email her at dear. My boyfriend and I are in our early 20s, and we recently moved in together after being in a long-distance relationship for four years.
Dear Therapist: My Boyfriend’s Depression Is Making Me Question Our Future Together. I want to be there for him, but his depressive episodes.
No one teaches us how to navigate a relationship when mental illness or depression enters the equation. I recently read a Washington Post article by a woman whose relationship was torn apart while she and her partner tried to deal with his depression. Last year when I plunged into a depressive episode during our relationship, my partner was at a loss. He had never dealt with this and wanted so badly to help, but had no idea what to do. Sure we hit bumps along the road, but in the end I felt loved, supported, and understood in a way I never had before during a depressive episode, and he felt like he knew what was going on—a big deal in this situation—and was equipped to deal with it.
It operates on the notion that the not-depressed partner is wonderful and selfless for standing by the partner with depression. They should therefore feel so lucky their partner is generously taking them on—ergo, broken and lucky. This means trying to follow their lead. Listening more than you talk.
By: Kevin Dooley. Dating someone with depression can be a lot to navigate. What can help? And you are with this other person for many reasons.
I will be 26 in 8 days and I have not had a boyfriend or a date in 5 and a half years. It all started when I got involved with another girl 6 years ago. I had feelings for her that I wanted to explore and 8 months into it, I knew that being a lesbian was not who I am. I have been depressed ever since that time. The problem is that I have no idea how to go about meeting men. I am attracted to many, but can not get up the courage to talk to them or pursue anything.
I am so afraid of something and I do not know what.
13 Things To Remember When You Love A Person Who Has Depression
A scan of the statistics reveals: 1 in 5 Americans will experience mental health struggles in their lifetime. Two things we can learn from conversations about dating a partner with depression:. All relationships face obstacles, some more than others. Dating someone with depression is no exception, and can even be more challenging. However, those with depression often have incredible capacities for empathy, understanding, and emotional insight, which enrich relationships.
Learn how others get through similar struggles , and make the most of your amazing partner, despite their depression.
happy. So how can it be that the person holding your hand is battling with feelings like hopelessness and despair? Since you want your bae to be happy.
In retrospect, this man was not a good match for me, but it was still a very painful experience, both because a serious relationship had ended and because I felt ashamed and thought that my depression had made me unlovable. Since this experience, I have learned a lot about my mental health and no longer feel ashamed of something beyond my control. With this self-knowledge, caring for my mental health has played a more positive role in all my other relationships. I have been able to communicate effectively about my health to significant others and now to my husband.
They may have crying spells, feelings of hopelessness, insomnia or over-sleeping, and changes in appetite. Here are a few things to keep in mind:. Be aware that there is no timeline for getting better. For some people, depression can last a few weeks, but others may be afflicted with symptoms for years. Learning about their symptoms and what they are going through can build your empathy and show your significant other that you care about their health and well-being.
Depression is commonly caused by a stressful situation or event, family history, or seasonal changes, among other things. There may also not be a readily identifiable reason.
8 Tips On Dating Someone With Depression
Relationships take work—and lots of it. They used to get really excited about stuff, or be interested in various hobbies. Of course, everybody feels down from time to time.
While we might all attribute things like feeling sad and crying a lot to depression, the mental illness can actually take a much more serious toll on.
Jenn Mann answers your sexiest questions — unjudged and unfiltered. When my boyfriend and I first started dating, he told me that he struggled with depression. In retrospect, I think I was naive. What can I do to help him? You are not alone and neither is your boyfriend: According to the American Psychological Association , as many as 17 million adults in this country suffer from depression.
Depression does not discriminate based on age, socioeconomics, fame or success. In fact, many celebrities have spoken openly about their own difficulties with depression, including Lady Gaga , Kristen Bell. Most recently, reports have come out that the newly married Justin Bieber, while thrilled with his marriage to Hailey Baldwin, has been struggling with depression and has undergone treatment for it. This really speaks to depression being an underlying issue and not a reflection of someone’s relationship.
That said, it impacts a relationship enormously. Understanding the signs and difficulties that depression can bring, and exactly how to get help, are crucial to keeping yourself — and your partnership — on an even keel when tides get rough. It is common to see sufferers struggle with apathy, hopelessness, loss of joy or interest in things that once brought pleasure, mood swings, exhaustion, obsessive thinking, sadness and anxiety.